I'll Love You For Always
by possibly-a-fangirl
Summary: Sigyn wants to escape a forced marriage to Thor and is hiding on Midgard. All is going well, but will a certain God of Tricks get in the way? AU and OC. Lemons. Note that this is based on a Loki/Sigyn prompt and is written for a friend.


**To the Ends of the Earth**

Sigyn

It'd been so long since I last saw Asgard. The golden city of the gods loomed both menacingly and welcoming in my mind, filling my head with it's siren call. I knew I couldn't go back, but the bright lure of familiarity and sameness still remained. A great sniffle brought me somewhat into the present, but I had to shake my head and stir the lemon and sugar into my tea far more than was necessary to bring myself back down to Earth.

That's where I was, where I had been for the last four months. Everyone had looked at me as though I was insane when I first crossed the Bifrost, appearing out of nowhere in rich maroon robes that I thought might be similar to what was worn in Midgard. Well, they were normal last time I was here, but I had switched from robes to a midnight blue tunic and jeans all the same, as they seemed to be more acceptable attire. Along with new clothes I had also picked up some illness. For the last week I had had been exhausted, nauseous, stuffed up and any number of appalling things.

Sitting in various quiet coffee shops had become my occupation, keeping eyes and ears out for anything unusual. After all, I had not much else to do. Escape was what brought me here, but I had to admit that beyond getting here I was clueless. Taking a tentative sip, I found the tea was the perfect temperature, and tucked a honey colored lock of hair behind my ear so I could enjoy my drink.

Alright, perhaps I was slightly unprepared. Maybe I had always counted on a warm bed with servants to care for me, meals that I didn't have to pay for, places I could navigate with my eyes closed and company that at least somewhat understood. _No, that's a lie. No one ever understood you,_ I thought before I could sweeten the truth. I absentmindedly ran a finger along the pale scar that ran along my collarbone, only as thick as two hairs' width, but still a smooth reminder under my fingertip.

"Miss, could I get you anything else?" asked a cheerful youth in a voice with a strong Irish accent that called me away from my musings. With a polite smile I declined, but he insisted on topping up my tea anyway. Ah, perhaps it was better I had stopped there. Slightly self-conscious, I pulled up the edge of my tunic to no avail and wiped my nose with my handkerchief.

My hands shook as I reached for the teacup, and I felt a chill run up my spine. A poorly disguised shudder attracted the attention of the other customers, but luckily the window was open and if asked I could have passed it off as being cold. After all, it was now February, somewhere around my 16th week of freedom, though I suppose the glitz of it had worn off.

I vaguely recalled the first few times that there had been storms, and just as a child might have, I would cower in absolute terror not of the thunder and lightning, but of what it meant. Thor was near, and that meant that the threat of being taken back was, too. He himself wasn't exactly what induced fear, true I never really cared for him (particularly not romantically), but home was what scared me above all else.

I finished my tea and pulled on my thick wool coat, suddenly the warmth and tininess of the shop felt unsafe. Bringing the cup back up to the helpful young server, who made a point of telling me to come back soon several times, I wrapped my coat tighter around me and made for the door.

Loki

I supposed from the bent heads and chattering teeth of the mortals that today was cold. I briefly wondered what cold was, I thought I knew once, but that was before Odin had unveiled that 'oh, and by the way son, you're a frost giant who was abandoned at birth, and we still love you but you'll never rule.' It stung like a splinter that couldn't be removed, and there were days when I almost thought of him as 'father.'

Kicking an unsuspecting chunk of ice away with a shiny black shoe, I tried to calm down. What was worst was that Thor made a point of being overly and condescendingly kind when he wasn't ignoring me for more brutish, manly company. After all, what could the future king be bothered with knowledge or wisdom, or even his "baby brother?"

It was almost a relief when I was asked to help look for Sigyn in Midgard (of course, Thor had more noble things to do). I was finally as alone as I felt. She wasn't incredibly difficult to find, though it had taken four weeks, but I understood her running away. If I were less conspicuous, I might have tried it myself. I had certainly thought of it, but Odin might notice my absence after a couple months.

I twirled the end of my emerald and gold scarf, wondering what to do. Eventually I would have to devise a way of bringing her back, but at the same time it was satisfying to watch Thor not get what he wanted, for once. In a way I almost wanted to hide Sigyn, to deny him the pleasure of, once again, getting the best and most beautiful.

I stopped walking, a statue on the icy pathway overlooking the stormy gray sea. _What if, just maybe, I took what Thor wanted?_ I asked myself slowly, turning the idea over in my mind, analyzing it in my critical mind's eye. _Well it couldn't be too difficult, she can't love him, and my specialty is tricks. How could he bear being snubbed... for me?_ I smiled, the same smile that always stretches across my face whenever I concoct a simply marvelous idea, before it fell.

I tried to picture myself. No, she was the most stunning goddess that I had ever seen. I wouldn't be the typical Asgardian brutish type, and besides, she wouldn't trust me. That was, if she even knew who I was... it was remarkable how many gods could pass Prince Loki "Odinson" without a second glance.

Sigyn was in the coffee shop. She had been there for about an hour now. I fixed my charcoal tie and brushed snowflakes from the raven hair that they so sharply contrasted. With a deep breath, I headed in, not sure what to do, but with the knowledge that it was time I did something.

The door opened with a jingling of bells, and something hit my solar plexus hard. Balled up fists, clenched around a gray wool coat, belonging to a strikingly beautiful woman. Her eyes, which matched the sea, locked on mine, rosy lips mumbled an apology as she slipped past, a tall, slender frame took a few tentative steps outside before turning back.

Sigyn

I ran into something as I headed out, my face momentarily crushed into a suit that smelled like twilight and herbs and something I couldn't place. An apology rolled instinctively off my tongue, but I was more preoccupied with leaving. Except, except there was something that I would never later recall that made me turn back. Curiosity perhaps, maybe a sense of something that wasn't normal, I really don't know. Emerald eyes met mine.

"Excuse me, but do I know you?" I asked quite suddenly. There was something eerily familiar about him. He was handsome, with hair the color of the midnight sky, delicately pale skin, clever eyebrows and his attire was formal compared to mine. _Oh, it...is it? Oh Odin above it is,_ I realized as I scrutinized him.

I suppose I looked a tad shocked, as he said, "My lady, are you alright? I think we may have met, my name is Loki." He smiled, looking almost genuinely concerned. _Yes, but tricks are his specialty, he is the god of mischief_, I reminded myself, sizing him up and wondering how to best get away.

"Why are you here?" I demanded, a little rudely. He raised his hands, an act of surrender and continued to feign innocence. "How did you find me?" _Probably sent here by __his brother_.

"I am sorry if I've somehow offended you. I assure you that our meeting is coincidental." Loki replied, smiling again in an infuriatingly casual way. "I'm in Midgard for a little break. It's good to get away."

"What are you playing at? Whatever it is, it's not working very well." I snapped, losing my patience. "Thor sent you here, no? I'm a little surprised that I haven't been dragged back yet." He sighed, and nodded his head away from the coffee shop doorway. People within earshot were starting to stare, and I felt a blush rise in my cheeks. I had no choice but to follow.

"Listen, I'm not sure what you're talking about, but I can assure you that whatever it is, no one has sent me anywhere." Loki answered, reaching out with one hand before deciding against it. It had started to drizzle, and I became aware that I was shivering. "If you must know, there are a few delicate family issues that I am taking a brief vacation from."

I was silent for quite some time. The rain began to pound, and my mind was oddly blank as I stared at him, searching for something or other. He wasn't telling me something, there were words resting on his pale pink lips that just wouldn't be said. I was vaguely aware of my teeth chattering.

"Well, it has been interesting meeting you. I apologize for being rude." I finally managed, not entirely truthfully. I didn't trust him, he was too clever for me to do so. I was still wary as I turned my back on him to walk away.

Loki

Sigyn had suspected me, which was more than I really expected. She knew that I was Thor's-... well, that we had been raised as siblings. Even more surprising was that she still distrusted me, I could see it in the tenseness of her body as she walked away, the slight pursing of her rosy mouth, the look in her eyes, which were now a light green. Then again, she had reason to distrust me, I would in her situation.

As she turned away, I had to ponder my next move. This hadn't gone horribly, but she wasn't as dull as I might have thought. She actually looked as though she might be quite clever, which I realized I quite liked.

I watched her head down the slick cobblestone street of the tiny, old village. She was still shaking from cold, and with her head down to shield her face from the wind, she missed a patch of ice. Sigyn slipped and hit the unforgiving ground with a thud.

My next move did not end up being a carefully planned trick, or a well thought line, but an instinctive action. I could distantly hear the slap of my own shoes on the stone streets as I ran to her and knelt down. She wasn't able to get up, and I could see her beautiful face was contorted with pain, I could hear her sharp, ragged breaths.

"Where does it hurt?" I asked in a voice that was too natural to be mine, too raw.

"Ow, damn damn dammit. It's my hip and this blasted, ouch, illness!" she choked, tears swimming in her eyes that she must have been bravely forcing not to fall. I gingerly slipped a hand between her shoulders and the road, and another under her waist, trying to cause as little injury as possible. Sigyn still yelped as I slowly stood her up.

"It's just, ah, a bruise." she confirmed as she reached her hands behind her to investigate. "Thank you... I think I can, ah, make it home from here." Taking a tentative step, she would've fallen again but for an arm I provided to steady herself.

"Here, you're going to need some help."

Sigyn

The doctor at the hospital eyed my form, muttering something about hippie parents and weird names. The fruits of my hours of waiting in a sterile room with steely industrial furniture were a little yellow tablet to relieve the pain from my hip, where I had fallen on an old injury, and a bottle of Advil for my cold. Loki, of all people, had waited patiently and had helped me through the fall, and though he was a bit quiet, I was genuinely glad to have even him there.

"So, can I help you home?" he asked when I had signed even more forms and was leaning on him as I limped out the door. "Well, actually I believe that you don't have much choice in the matter, I'm not leaving you like this."

"Thank you... for everything. I couldn't have gotten here without you." I answered as he helped me into a taxi, rewarding him with a smile. I still didn't entirely trust him, but I owed Loki, and he had shown himself to be more caring than I had thought possible, even though we were still relatively strange to each other. We had played a handful of times as children, and had met as just barely acquaintances since.

Home had recently come to mean a tiny flat on the third floor of an unremarkable square, brown building with perfectly arranged flower baskets that were empty this time of year and a square patch of frosty lawn. I had brought some gold when I ran away (which the teller at the bank was in awe at) and for a small amount each month I had a hideout and somewhere warm to sleep.

Wrapped in Loki's jacket, I was aided in getting out of the car, half carried up the stairs, and helped into bed. It may have just been me, but it was as if thoughts were no longer going through the god's head, as if he just acted. I said a grateful goodnight, and was left to dream about tricksters and gold cities and snow.

Loki

It was curious. When I left the apartment, closing the door as gently as possible so as not to disturb her, I didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't feel self-satisfied, not even proud of gaining her respect, just worried. If I had had a key, I quite likely would have used it to go back, to make sure she was alright. _Nonsense, you're simply tired... if you get some rest you'll be more focused in the morning,_ I told myself.

I was still oddly distracted when I sat on the plush bed in my suite, ignoring the knocking of the hotel maid. I glanced at the looking glass and noticed the god who was usually so put together had damp and messy hair that stuck out at odd angles, his crisp white shirt was nearly soaking wet, a crease in his brow.

The same god, for I did not wholly see him as being me, peeled off his clothes, which were all varying degrees of damp, like layers of skin until he was raw and bare. The warm water caressed his skin as he thought about nothing in particular. He sighed a relaxed sort of sigh.

I shuddered a little bit, one particular trickle had felt almost like a gentle touch. I really must have been too tired, for I started remembering. Remembering the feeling of being rocked in loving arms, walking with fa-... Odin, the tickle of grass underneath my back, the coarse, thick paper of the books in the library.

It was dangerous, this remembering, because there was a fine line in my head. Try to hold too much in and I would burst, but let everything out and I feared I'd burst at the seams. I didn't notice that there was warm droplets running down my cheeks, nor that they weren't from the shower head. I can't remember at what point I dried off and dragged myself to bed.

Sigyn

When I woke, there was nothing that really could have prepared me for how sore and stuffy I would be. The yellow tablet did a little to help, and I eventually gathered the will to get out of bed. I still had my clothes on from the night before, and a jacket that wasn't mine. It's smell wasn't mine, but it was an almost comforting sort of difference.

I suppose my mind was rather fuzzy, whether from the early morning sleepiness or the drugs I wasn't entirely sure. I felt a little hazy, but sort of comfortably numb as I deftly fixed some toast and tea, spilling just a little on my tunic. My mind was sharper with the intake of caffeine and the gradual movement, but with this came an awareness of the twinging in my side.

Having unceremoniously wolfed down an unremarkable breakfast, I slowly and sluggishly started back towards where my clothing, the majority of it new and still in crinkly plastic bags scattered on the floor, was. Bending down hurt, making my eyes water as I moved at a turtle's pace, slowly grabbing leggings, a purple blouse and a heavy sweater that was cozily big on me.

Tentative knocking on my apartment door made me whip my head around. No one had ever knocked on the door, with the exception of the stodgy old landlord who had presented me with a bottle of stale wine when I moved in. Wondering who was calling but unable to peer up through the window, I was forced to open the door.

"Er, good morning." came the voice of none other than Loki, _probably back for his coat, _I thought. I invited him in reluctantly, wishing that I didn't look so groggy and noticing in the broad daylight how shabby the apartment really was. He was much less formally dressed today, but even in dark jeans and an emerald dress shirt he still possessed an elegance that was simply unattainable to my blasted ill self.

"Hello. I, um, have your jacket. Sorry if it's a tad wrinkled, I didn't have time to, ah." I started, but a sneeze cut me off in a most embarrassing way.

"Are you alright? Is there anything I can do for you?" he immediately asked, reaching out to steady me. "I came to see how you were." I smiled, his lean frame looked just a little awkward bent over mine.

"Um, thank you. I'm... alright." I answered, brushing a particularly messy part of my hair back as inconspicuously as I could manage. "Would you care to sit down?" I motioned to the tiny table with three chairs (I had only ever used one) that had my teapot in the center. I suddenly felt too hot, but temperature swings had become an irritating normality.

"Do you need some help with that?" Loki asked, trying to hide an almost endearingly crooked smile as I struggled with pulling the sweater over my head. His hands worked as modestly as possible as the offending article was removed, but I still felt my skin prickle. His fingers were pleasantly cool, but colder than I had expected.

Loki

I had decided that I could stop foolishly fretting if I went back to the apartment and saw if she was alright. I guess I was a little stern with myself, but something was distracting me, it was getting harder to try and carry out the plan. The more I saw her, the more... I don't know.

If she hadn't invited me in I could have been content to have seen she was fine and left. But being a gentleman, I had to, and I tensed every time Sigyn winced. However, it was when I offered to pull off her sweater, a pretty thing that was made of soft wool and smelled divine, that it was my turn to wince.

I didn't mean to look, I tried to be as genteel as possible. Her blouse had ridden up just an inch or maybe a few, exposing the pale silken skin of her back that should have been as pristine as the freshly fallen snow outside. I felt sick, sicker than Sigyn herself when I saw fresh scars that looked like they tore across her back.

All I could manage to ask myself was, _who_? There were several less coherent emotions running faster than lightning in my mind, but she hadn't noticed I had seen the angry marks. I could almost feel the whip myself.

"I think I might have something to drink, er, would you like some?" Sigyn asked, returning me to the present as I saw her regarding my hands, which were trembling as if frightened. "You look cold." I replied that tea would be wonderful, while taking a few deep breaths.

I had begun to lose control, something that couldn't happen. Recently, when I lost control, on rare occasion I would begin to slip into what I really was. A red eyed, icy skinned monster... a frost giant. Shame washed over me whenever I turned, it reminded me just how different I was from everyone, most of all the person I thought I was before.

The thought was shaken out when Sigyn slipped into a chair next to me with a steaming mug of tea and a glass of water, along with a bowl of some sort of soup that smelled strongly of tomato. It was quiet for a minute or so, both of us feeling awkward before she had to get up for a blanket.

"So, why are you here?" Sigyn sniffed, sipping at her soup while still looking somehow refined. "Why Midgard?" She looked politely curious, and I could tell that the goddess was looking for more than the evasive answer of yesterday. It was becoming difficult to find something clever to say when her slight shoulders rose and fell in hypnotic rhythm, and I felt a sudden impulse to see if her hands were as soft as they looked. _Loki, stop that... there is no goddamn reason to lose your head, _I reminded myself.

"Are you sure you're not going to take me back?" Sigyn suddenly demanded with a frown that scrutinized my entire being. It was a curious feeling this, but I knew that she wasn't going to wait long. "I think I might be willing to trust you, but you're going to have to be honest."

Sigyn

I didn't know where my last words had come from. Loki made me a little uneasy, not like the sick uneasiness that possessed my body... something that I couldn't place. There was something that really made me want to trust him, but I'd come too far, I'd built my walls too carefully to let anyone really get over.

"The truth... ah, a beautiful and yet terrible thing it is." Loki said while watching the hypnotic twirl of the spoon in his tea. He was stalling, and he knew I knew. "Alright, but you must listen, let me finish."

I raised an eyebrow. He sighed slightly. "It's difficult, always being second to someone, always standing in someone's shadow. I found out, well, I'm not... I'm not Odin's son." Loki glanced down, and I instinctively covered his hand with mine. He looked embarrassed, and I would have said something if I had known just what.

"I won't lie to you, I was ordered to find you... by the 'father' whose lack of affection was finally so painfully explained." Loki continued, talking almost to himself now as he ran a slender fingered hand through his raven hair. "I'm not going to take you back if that's where you don't want to be, in fact, I may not even go back myself. I understand running away, believe me I know."

I was getting warm again, but Loki's hand kept me at a comfortably stable temperature. I was becoming increasingly interested in how he stayed so chilled, but even more so in him. There had always been rumors that he had magic or that there was something amiss when he was born, petty rumors that petty gods used to maliciously explain why he was different from them. That or he went unnoticed. I wanted to be sympathetic, to be comforting, to just do_ something_.

I looked at Loki, with his carefully shielded eyes and brooding brow, and it was like a mirror. I knew how it felt to have a father who didn't care, who despised you. I knew how it felt to never really be understood. I tried to stop it, but the feeling of the whip he would carry, the bruises that had to be covered, the sound of his yells telling me I would never be good enough, the guilt of knowing I had killed my mother when I was born... they smashed down my wall before I could even alert the guards.

"Sigyn? Sigyn, are you-? What's wrong?" came a voice, full of worry that I didn't deserve, into my mind. A cool hand brushed my forehead, but I turned away. I was vaguely aware that I was crying, which was highly uncomfortable with my current cold, but I didn't wipe any of the tears away.

"What happened?" Loki tried again, this time standing over me with one hand on the back of the chair. I was distantly noticing how tall he was, the smooth tone of his voice. "Should I leave?" I was quiet, realizing what I must look like, how uncontrolled I had acted.

"I'm sorry, I just... well, I understand what it is you speak of." I replied, wiping my face and trying to prevent a crimson blush from stealing over my face. "Don't go."

Loki

She sounded almost like a child, imploring me to stay with eyes that were now nearly as green as mine. I felt lighter after unexpectedly telling her what I had never voiced to anyone, but now it was Sigyn who wasn't telling me something.

We ended up on the sofa, and I found that her skin was as soft as I had imagined it. Sigyn's golden waves were spilling over my shoulder as she rested her head there, whatever medication she had taken finally taking effect. She had draped my arm around her and made herself comfortable with a blanket, her warm weight welcome against me.

It was odd. I mean, neither of us really knew what we were doing, but she was ill and I wanted to make her better somehow. I didn't mind the warm, skittish feeling in my chest either. Something felt strange, new and a little uncertain, but good.

"Mm, you're still cold, Loki." she mumbled a little sleepily. "Not unpleasantly so, but... a little chilly." I waited for her to ask for a reply to the statement, but Sigyn was quiet, save for the soft sound of her breaths. Her eyelids drooped after a while, surprisingly dark feathery eyelashes seemed to weigh tonnes, and she leaned on me more heavily now.

I had a really desperate urge to stay put, to never leave. _Well, it's no use further denying things,_ I inwardly sighed as I glanced over at the sick little goddess that had decided to trust a trickster. I realized that it would make sense, scary as it felt... I had feelings for her.

Sigyn

Waking up in the evening felt strange, even stranger since I didn't remember getting into bed. I also didn't remember the warm oat bag that was under my neck. When the memory of Loki coming, of remembering what should have stayed buried, of Loki caring, came back... oh, how I just wanted to go back to sleep.

He must have carried me to bed, and I suddenly wondered where he was. There was no other sound in the apartment but my own breathing, which felt considerably clearer. _I was a bit alarming, no wonder he left... I suppose I won't see him after this_, I thought, cursing myself for driving him away.

Crazy or not, I was starting to like Loki. I felt almost safe with him, and for better or worse, we were very similar. We both needed someone, someone to trust and... well, I don't know. I knew that trusting him was a bad idea for several reasons, but there was something that drew me to him.

_You're thinking crazy thoughts now,_ I reprimanded myself. Shaking my head, which felt much less achy, I rolled over and nodded off again.

Loki

Sigyn had been initially surprised to see me back. I had only left for the night, but I got the sense (or perhaps just foolishly hoped) that she missed me. I had looked up a spell to help with her recovery, and Sigyn was intrigued by it. We spent the next week reading, going out when Sigyn felt better, and were inseparable. More recently she had confided in me, slowly at first, the story of her father and the scars. I listened in a quiet rage at the person who had hurt her so horribly, and was able to later heal the wounds so that they were nearly invisible.

After about two weeks, she offered me the foldout bed in the sofa. I eagerly accepted, moving my two suitcases out was easy, and I decided that a celebratory dinner was in order. Just like an Asgardian feast, but with a bit more class and less fighting.

"Where are we going, Loki?" Sigyn asked that evening, calling to me from her room. I replied that we were eating at _Le Chateau Trefle_, a restaurant that we had passed a few days ago and that she had mentioned she wanted to try.

So far, I was unsure if Sigyn saw me as a friend, we were certainly close, or if she shared my... feelings. It felt odd, coming to terms with what I now suspected was fast becoming love. I could never deserve Sigyn, but I also couldn't change how I felt.

I was ready in the same suit we had met in when she came out, and my mind just stopped. Sigyn, in a leaf green dress that was elegant and yet subtly seductive, took the arm that I offered her and we headed out. Mortal men stopped and stared as we passed, and I was acutely aware of how beautiful the goddess with me was.

The food was a blend of two of the mortals' cultures; Irish and French, but I couldn't recall what I ordered, even as I ate it. Sigyn looked a little distracted, though by what I couldn't tell. I was distracted, but as for the cause of that, I knew precisely who was to blame.

Sigyn

Loki had grown dearer to me than I thought anyone ever could in the time we had become friends, although I had become increasingly unsure if friendship was really what I wanted. As caring and kind as he had been, more than I thought possible, I wanted more. I didn't know how love was supposed to feel, but if it felt anything like the way I melted when he smiled, then I was in it.

Loki was a bit of a distraction throughout out dinner together. He would try to hide a smile or touch my hand or laugh at something I said, and an almost bubbly feeling would spread from my stomach to my throat.

The dinner had had pasta, meat and salad, but I only really remembered the strawberry mousse cake. Loki was just complimenting my dress (green, I had learned, was his favorite color) when I couldn't help but laugh.

"What is it?" he asked, his dark eyebrows raised in innocent curiosity. A generous dab of whipped strawberry cream had somehow attached itself to the tip of his slightly pointed nose. Not caring that several of the wealthy mortals who were dining here shot us disapproving looks, I reached out on impulse to swipe the cream with my finger.

"Be careful... you wouldn't want to eat like an Asgardian, now." I teased, popping the offending strawberry topping into my mouth. We'd both been to enough feasts to know what the table manners (or lack thereof) there were like at the huge feasts held in the Great Hall.

"Thank you." Loki chuckled in reply, settling the bill with our passing server. The man was quite shocked to see him pay with cash, and there was a great deal of cash, and he stared at us in puzzlement as we left. The March wind was still a little frosty, but Loki's jacket kept out the cold.

In this small town, the streets were almost deserted at 9:00. It was dark now, the moon could be seen clearly, and behind it the stars, the whole universe, and even Asgard. I wondered if anyone else could see us right now. Loki's arm was a comforting weight around my waist.

After a deep breath, I asked in a voice that was smaller than I expected it to be, "Loki?" A pair of eyes as green as a meadow of clovers looked down to meet mine in reply.

"Loki, do you love me?" I finished, a bundle of nerves as I almost looked to his face, but turned away.

Silence answered me. _I've rushed things... oh damn, why couldn't I shut up?_ I scolded myself, but my musings were interrupted. A cool hand touched my jaw, gently turning it, and my lips were brushed chastely by his, sending chills to every nerve in my body.

"More than I can say." Loki replied, accompanied by the slightest of smiles.

"I love you, too." I whispered.

Loki

I had waited what felt like an eternity to finally feel what I did in that moment, when she finally said three words that made me happier than any others. I leaned into Sigyn for what would be our first real kiss, but stopped.

"What?" she asked, her head tilted slightly in concern. I felt self conscious, sharing such an intimate moment with just anyone that could pass by.

"Nothing, love." I answered quietly. "Let's go back to the apartment." The remaining five or so minutes of walking were torture in their length, particularly when Sigyn would seemingly go out of her way to flash me a smile or rest her head on my shoulder.

When the apartment door was shut behind us, I had to take a deep breath before looking at Sigyn. She hung up my coat before wrapping her arms behind my neck, leading me into an embrace that was infinitely more passionate than our previous one. Her body was warm against mine, and my tongue was pleading to be permitted entrance through her rosy lips before it was finally allowed.

Sigyn's mouth was sweet and we embraced countless times more. My tie, vest and scarf had all had to be removed from the warmth she was spreading through me. Her own dress was beginning to feel warm when my hands were finally given permission to roam free. I tried to keep my touch modest, but it became very difficult indeed when Sigyn's slim fingers were lazily traveling along my back or pinching an earlobe or doing any number of things that made me lose all control over my thoughts.

Soon the buttons of my snowy white shirt were undone along with the zipper at the back of Sigyn's dress, and both garments lay discarded on the floor as we stumbled to her bedroom. When we parted to take panting breaths, my mind started working again.

She was slenderly fashioned with certain... assets that were stunning, but wide-eyed in ivory underclothes she looked nervous, like a doe caught in a trap. I wanted, no, _needed_ her, but somehow I held back. I took Sigyn's hand gently in mine, pained but patient.

"We don't have to..." I told her, and honestly. If anything were to happen, I didn't want her to regret it. I tried to ignore what was fast becoming aching desire.

"No, I want to, I just... need a second." Sigyn answered, taking a deep breath with her stormy gray eyes shut. I took a moment to do the same, but I was startled out of it by her gasp.

One look in the vanity mirror on the wall confirmed it when I saw red eyes stare back at me. If ever a time for this, it wasn't now. Cheeks flushing, I turned away. I didn't want to see her reaction to the one secret I had kept, nor did I want to see her recoil at the monster I was.

"You're, you're..." Sigyn trailed off softly, and I prepared for any number of things. "Beautiful." That I didn't prepare for. I cautiously raised my gaze and frowned.

"I'm a frost giant." I said weakly. I could feel my icy face burning with shame and guilt, and recoiled from her slight fingers. "A monster." Turning away and sitting up, I prepared for her to tell me to leave.

"You're the most beautiful person I've ever seen." she insisted, resting her chin on my shoulder with a tenderness that I didn't deserve. One pale finger started to trace the Jotun markings that ran in angry lines all over the hideous body that I didn't want to believe was mine.

"You haven't seen many people then." I laughed bitterly, turning to watch her.

Sigyn frowned then, "Listen Loki, because you are still Loki, frost giant or not... you mean more to me than anything. You must think me fickle indeed then if you think that I would care that you look a certain way. I love you."

"I love you, too." I managed, for then she was planting slight kisses along the midnight pathways on my skin. There was a weight released, and I felt different... better than I had in my whole life.

Sigyn

A frost giant. It explained a lot. Why Loki thought I'd love him less I didn't know, but I still wanted him, and I proved it. The pale blue of his skin was mysteriously appealing in the low light. He was cautious, almost unbearably so, before we were able to pick up where we left off.

My eyes were sorely tempted to roll back to face the ceiling, but Loki was a far more handsome sight. He was interchangeably passionate and gentle, and long, dark hair tickled against my bare collarbone as the god showered me with soft kisses. Loki looked up at me, his eyes silently asking permission. I was sure he could hear my heart fluttering in my chest.

"Yes... I want you, Loki." I murmured, pushing against his cool skin. He fumbled with the clasps on my back before my chest was bare and slightly chilled. I tucked myself beneath the blankets, Loki following, our touch never broken. His slim hands elicited a soft moan from me when they wandered over the newly exposed skin, causing the god to smile mischievously.

"Mm, don't do that." Loki whispered as I bit my lip to keep from making any noise. He proceeded to quietly fill my ear with soft nothings, which made me shudder against his hard, lean frame. Nipping gently at the smooth skin of his collarbone, I took my turn in letting my fingers roam over his azure marble chest, then progressively lower. I could feel Loki's low rumble of pleasure when my fingertips grazed the stitching on his dress pants' back pockets, and more so when my thumbs hooked at his belt loops to pull them and whatever undergarment lay beneath them below his knees.

A stiff length was nudging my thigh as Loki kissed a path from my lips to where our final barrier lay, before it too was discarded in the crumpled heap of clothes we had abandoned. I took a deep breath while he took a moment to apply protection, my fists clenched in anticipation of both pleasure and pain.

"Shh, relax. I'll be gentle, I promise." Loki assured me with more control in his voice than my ragged breathing could have allowed. One hand softly rubbing my stomach and another steadying himself on the bed linens, slowly he pushed, entering where no one ever had before. Centimeter by centimeter, the god gently worked himself in, stopping when I winced only to start just a little again.

After the first moments of discomfort, I was overwhelmed by the feeling of pleasure building inside me. When I convinced Loki that I was ready for more, he obliged by rocking my hips with deep, fast thrusts that left me gasping for air as I was brought to a toe-curling climax. However, despite my cries and the scratches that I had left on his back, Loki didn't stop until he had brought me to a second, and nearly a third orgasm.

The moan of ecstasy that he produced was enough to take me off the edge, along with the feeling of his fingers lazily stroking well below my stomach. There was nearly two minutes where we were both silent, sweat salty on both of our skins, which were becoming more similar in color as Loki calmed.

Toppling beside me, he kissed my cheek gently before gathering my smaller body against his in pale, strong arms. We slept there until sun brushed our faces at mid morning, happy beyond measure and more complete than ever.

Loki

It must have been late indeed when I woke, blinded at first by bright sunlight from an open window. The sounds of the street could be heard below, but the noise was quiet enough that I could still hear the soft sound of Sigyn's breathing, her back pushing against my chest with every inhalation. I gently ran my thumb along her exposed shoulder to check if she was real.

Moaning for a moment at the disturbance, Sigyn yawned and stretched, cat-like almost, before turning over. Her eyes were still heavy-lidded and several strands of golden hair had strayed into her face, partially obscuring eyes that were a deep sapphire blue. With a final arch of her slender back, she rolled over so that I was on my back and she could use my chest as a pillow.

"Mm, good morning, Loki." Sigyn mumbled, her voice muffled against my skin.

"How are you, love?" I queried, trying to read her face, which was still cloudy with sleepiness. She smiled lazily, turning her head so she could see my face.

"A tad sore, but overall quite wonderful. I wish I could wake up like this every morning." Sigyn teased in reply, laying a soft peck on my collarbone.

"That could be arranged. You're alright though? I mean, I didn't..."

She ran her long, thin fingers through my messy hair, laughing, "I'm not made from glass, you know." I chuckled when she furiously blew away a wisp of unwanted hair from her eyes as she crawled up to kiss me. I sighed, this all seemed too perfect.

"I think that I need a shower." I muttered, noticing for the first time the remaining sweat that still glistened on my skin.

Wrinkling her nose in mock disgust, Sigyn chuckled, "Yes, I believe we both do, but you can go first. Unless you'd like to see if the shower is fit for the pair of us." _Damn,_ I thought, as another thought entered my mind, _how am I to get out of bed?_ It was silly, I realized, but the morning air still made me feel exposed, and I wasn't entirely without modesty.

Grabbing the topmost bed sheet and using it as an overlarge toga, I grinned back at where Sigyn was shaking her head at me. She twisted herself up in the other end of the sheet so that we both had a rather awkward cover. We tripped several times on the way to the bathroom, but eventually we reached it without too much hassle.

It took a moment for the water to warm up, but eventually the perfect temperature was achieved. I willed myself not to watch as Sigyn unwrapped herself, but I still caught a glimpse of ivory skin as the little minx lured me behind the faded yellow shower curtain.

Sigyn

It was much later that day, after one lengthy shower and a late brunch, that I finally dressed and was presentable. Clouds were rolling in from across the sea, but since no rain was called for, Loki and I set off for a walk.

The countryside near the small town we had been staying in was beautiful, even if most of the flora was dead. The wind was still brisk, but a bright sun came out and warmed me as we meandered nearer to the cliffs that marked the border between land and sea. It was beginning to feel a little like spring.

We stopped near the edge of a cliff only to lie down and watch the clouds roll in. I could feel Loki's heartbeat from where he lay behind me, an arm protectively around my waist.

"Am I too cold?" he asked, and I realized I must have shuddered a little. Something was odd, but since I couldn't place it I dismissed the thought.

"No... a little chilly, but not too cold." I answered, turning to see red eyes meet mine. It was a little surprising every time I saw Loki as a frost giant, but it really didn't matter. My fingers lazily ran along the dark tattoo-like markings that colored his icy skin.

"Are you sure it isn't going to rain? Those clouds are awfully dark, Loki."

He studied the sky for a moment before replying, "No, it shouldn't rain, but maybe we should go back all the same." A thunderclap echoed across the sky as we slowly separated and got to our feet.

Thunder again. Loki and I got to lower, rocky ground as just as lightning hit somewhere close by. Scrambling to the nearest boulder, I pulled him under. I wasn't sure whether to laugh or to be frightened for him and I, so I did both.

"It looks as though my weather forecast may have been seriously flawed." Loki declared with a chuckle.

"Just a little bit." I laughed. _I suppose weather by the water can be flukey_, I mused, but was distracted when I was pulled into a kiss. The god tasted sweet, almost like a cold drink of water on a warm day... _what do I taste like?_

I never got tired of seeing him smile. As we broke apart, I couldn't stop staring at the bright green eyes that looked back at me. Crawling to sit beside him, I contented myself by playing with a lock of raven hair.

"I love you." I told him. His hand came to rest on mine.

"I love you, too."

Suddenly, the crunch of stones under heavy footfalls could be heard, making us both sit up only in time to witness the intruder. My heart dropped into my stomach.

Loki

I should have known when I heard the thunder. I should have been more cautious. Damn it all, we should never have stayed here so long. No matter what we should have done, I was holding Sigyn's hand as we both stared up in disbelief at the god that we both wished least to see.

"Get up." snarled Thor. "How lovely it is to see you again Sigyn. And you as well Loki, I was wondering when you'd be back. Now I can see why you took your time."

On my feet now, I said, "Listen, Thor, I know-"

"I am aware that you know quite a lot, however you seem to have forgotten a certain detail: Sigyn and I are betrothed."

The silence then was like a taut rope, broken by a _crack_ that sounded like lightning. I realized a second too late that Thor's hand had flown at Sigyn, and an angry red mark flowered on her face.

"How dare you," I hissed, rage boiling inside me as I stepped in front of her, "I should have your life for that insult." Thor stared right through me.

"How long has this been going on? Don't deny it, I saw you, and I heard you just now." he cried, his face growing red in sharp contrast to his sandy hair. "Did he manipulate you? What have you done with him?"

"I'm sorry, Thor. I am in love with Loki, I have been for some time now." Sigyn answered, her voice relatively calm, considering the situation. "I am breaking our engagement... please, try to understand."

Her fingers were wrapped in mine, squeezing my hand so hard I thought it might break. I wanted to scream, to run away with her, but we were all rooted to the earth.

"In love?" Thor repeated, barely above a whisper. "In love. I had hoped you would love me, Sigyn, but it is not necessary. I will give you more than you deserve for deserting me; we will be married, we will never speak of this. I will be gracious brother, you may go free so long as you never see my bride again."

"But-"

"You cannot do this!" I cried. Sigyn had buried her face in my shoulder, her arms wrapped around me. Every fiber of my being screamed out in protest. I shielded her and clung to her as I would my own life, but to no avail. Thor had reopened the Bifrost and already Sigyn had become thin in my hands, and then they were gone, vacuumed into the sky.

Sigyn

The days after my return to Asgard were grim. I was locked in a room under heavy guard, like another relic or spoil of war. I would neither eat nor sleep until I had no choice.

My body and mind both ached for him. I would sometimes see him, almost feel his cool touch, but it was always less than the perfection of reality. No matter how they tried, they could not make me forget him.

It was after a month, when I was sufficiently broken, numb enough not to put up resistance, that I was told of the upcoming wedding. Even then, I sobbed and tore everything apart in that solid stone chamber, a glorified cell. By the time I was being prepared, I was nearly exhausted.

It is a strange sensation, to have no control. I was told that he would be found and killed before my eyes if I put up any resistance. It may have been an empty threat, but more likely than not Thor would have done it out of spite. He had become much stronger and more forceful than the boy I grew up with, and though I hoped it was a phase, the effects of being bested for once, I had learned better than to hope for much.

By the time I had been bathed, dressed and polished to a shine, I no longer recognized my body. I felt too thin for the rich white dress, too hollow to go through with this. I knew why it would be Loki who would die if I resisted. I no longer cared about death, I was at a point where it would be welcomed.

It was a long walk to the Grand Hall, and an even longer one down the ruby carpeted stretch leading to where I would be sentenced. I didn't try to smile, instead, I focused on the floor ahead of my feet and tried to drown out the music and cheers. _This is a nightmare, I am not really here. I am sleeping beside Loki... I'll wake up any moment_.

Suddenly, I was beside Thor and my hand was smothered by his larger one. Odin was saying something about eternal union and love, but I just tried to keep breathing. I nodded when Thor did, and it was much later on when I stiffly ejected my lines from where they stuck at the back of my throat. I barely noticed when the cheering grew louder and I was being kissed.

Thor didn't kiss the way I thought he would. I hadn't even thought about kissing him, but it was still different. He was gentle, almost tender, and I tried not to think about Loki, my trickster.

I ate nothing at the feast. I felt sick. People were being introduced to Thor and I, we were receiving gifts, there was laughter and merriment everywhere, but I just nodded when I needed to and gave the slightest of smiles when required. I was exhausted and desperately wanted everything to be over.

Finally I was led to a luxurious suite by Thor, my h-. I couldn't think about it.

Loki

I had returned to Asgard a week later, if only to be close to her, under an oath of secrecy about any and all happenings in Midgard. I gladly gave it.

Loki couldn't have even she whom he loved most, that too had to be ripped from him and bestowed upon Thor. Typical. I could feel her, see her even when she wasn't there. Once I even tried to conjure a vision of her from memory, an apparition, but nothing healed the the hole she had left.

I didn't recognize myself anymore. Whether frost giant or god, I couldn't identify with the thin figure who had circles under his eyes that stared back at me in the looking glass. My clothes still smelled like her, and I couldn't let go.

When the date of the wedding was announced, I curled up into a ball for hours.

Eventually, I decided that something had to be done. Odin wouldn't give her the slightest chance of an escape, that was undeniable. _Then it will have to be a rescue_. For the millionth time, I wished Thor wasn't there, even as I worked on a plan. I would even have been happy to be Thor.

I had it. It was a simple matter of being someone I wasn't.

Sigyn

"According to custom, this is the part where you leap into my arms and we lose ourselves in passion for the remainder of the evening." he chuckled.

I had planted myself to the floor, unable to look at him or think of anything but Loki. If I ever escaped, would he even want me after Thor? Escape... it was better not to think of that tantalizing dream.

"I do believe we are completely alone, don't you? In that case, come here." I looked down as I slowly, unwillingly stepped closer, half-noticing a pair of black boots.

"Look at me."

My gaze traveled slowly upwards until they caught sight of dark armor with hints of green. Head shooting up, I realized I was hallucinating. Loki in Asgardian attire stood where Thor was a moment ago, smiling gently at me.

"You aren't real." I whispered. These visions were almost more cruel than harsh reality, and they would drive me insane if I didn't stop imagining the impossible.

"I can assure you that I am. In fact, the real Thor is in his very own wardrobe, in a drugged sleep." Loki stated in a very matter-of-fact tone. I warily tiptoed over to the giant wooden wardrobe and gingerly opened one of the two doors.

Thor, gagged and snoring, propped up inside. I could scarcely believe it. Looking back at Loki, for it was really him, I broke into tears.

I was kissing him, the real Loki. His hands had snaked their way into my hair the way they usually did, I could smell the same comforting smell, and I realized that I wasn't the only one crying. In fact, when we broke apart, it was impossible to tell whose face was wetter.

"How did you-? How long will he be asleep?" My questions poured out in between embraces, each one patiently answered. Loki had drugged Thor before he had gotten ready, then assumed his form. The thunderer would be fast asleep til well after sunset the next day.

"I will never lose you like that again." he promised, holding me close. "Can you forgive me?" Our breathing was a rhythm, completely in sync.

"I love you. There is nothing to be sorry for." I replied, laughing as tears ran down my cheeks.

"You know, we were officially married. I even signed the document after Odin and with my name." Loki said slowly, looking up at me... nervously.

"I can't breathe." was all I managed to get out before stumbling back to Thor's bed.

"Shh, it's okay. In and out, in and out." he murmured, arm around my shoulders. "I just thought... well, if it's not what you want, I won't hold you to any of it. I have the envelope here, it can go in the fire if you want."

"No! I mean, it's... thank you. I can't believe this."

"I love you, Sigyn." he said earnestly, with a soft kiss on my cheek for extra emphasis. It had somehow started as being the worst day of my life and ended as the best night.

"Seeing as our guest here is very much asleep and it is our wedding night..." I began coyly, but was cut off when I was pounced on.

We simultaneously kissed and wrestled for control, and when I got to the top, I pinned my god to the mattress, torturing both of us by removing his tunic and upper attire painfully slowly. He had made me feel unbearably wonderful my first time, and I wanted to repay the favor.

"When did you turn into such a tease?" Loki playfully asked, shuddering as I traced one nipple, pinching it lightly. I could feel his muscles spasm as I did my best to kiss him all over, realizing that he was quite ticklish.

"When you corrupted me." I laughed in reply.

It was interesting to study Loki as he came unraveled. His hair stuck out at odd angles, his eyes were hooded, and he was trying to disguise the small noises that escaped his slightly parted lips. I likely looked no more composed than he.

"I like it when you moan." I told him, crawling up for a quick kiss. I decided I needed to taste more of him. I could feel him shuddering as I removed his leggings, revealing the evidence if his need.

When I looked at how long he was I began to question how much I could even fit. Taking a tentative lick, I discovered that Loki tasted sweet and salty. I nearly lost my grip when he arched his back accompanied by a groan, and the more of his length I took in while stroking what I couldn't, the more ragged his breathing became.

"I- oh, I can't hold on." he warned me. At that moment, a warm, thick liquid poured down the back of my throat as Loki grew softer in my mouth. Tremors still ran through him when I came back up beside him.

"Wow... er, would you like some help out of that?" Loki asked with a slight smile, gesturing to the heavy dress I still wore, and regaining some of his former eloquence. "Because I would be glad to assist."

Loki

My fingers were still shaking a little, hindering the undoing of the snaps and buttons on the dress Sigyn wore. Finally, her honey colored hair was spilling out of its restraints and both clothes and underclothes were coming off fast. It was taking all of my self control not to tear everything off and just ravish my beautiful goddess. Finally, the last barriers between me and her skin were discarded.

I allowed my fingers to explore, making Sigyn squirm, as I kissed her with as much fervor as I dared without bruising her lips. Already she was wet with desire, but I decided that it was only fair to tease her in return. I brushed my hair aside and moved towards the end of the bed, spreading her ivory legs further.

When my tongue started to dart across her tight opening Sigyn nearly screamed. Shaking violently, her moans must have been audible from outside, she buried one hand in my hair. My little goddess tasted better than any of the delicacies of this realm or any other, and when I slipped one, then two fingers inside her as I licked and sucked, she shivered and cried out in delight.

"Would you like to see how you taste?" I asked, smiling proudly at how she was still shaking.

"Maybe a little... I'd prefer if you were inside me." she breathlessly answered. I couldn't help but laugh, she was insatiable. My mouth found hers as I applied one of the useful protection items from Midgard.

"Ready?"

"Would it be okay if you were a little bit... ah, rougher?" That I could easily do. With a slight growl, I brought her onto my lap and let gravity add to our pleasure. She was so tight, and it seemed like every inch of her was molded to fit me perfectly.

"Oh... fuck me Loki." Sigyn whimpered brokenly between gasps and moans. Gods, she didn't even know what she was doing to me. From the way she bit her bottom lip to the light in her eyes when she reached ecstasy, everything Sigyn did just seemed to arouse me further. "I'm all yours. I- I'll be your sl-"

"Don't. We belong to each other now. Don't ever say things like that." I demanded, even stopping my harsh thrusts to make sure she understood. I could barely stand to keep still, but Sigyn couldn't think of herself, of us, that way.

"Mm, I understand... just, please." she moaned, kissing the bridge of my nose as she bucked wildly and desperately against me.

"You should ask for what you want" It was unfair for me to tease, but there was something captivating about watching Sigyn become absolutely frenzied with desire. Her mouth was trying to form words, but nothing came out.

"I want you... to fuck me as hard as you possibly can." she managed breathlessly. "Please." It was precisely what I needed.

I was vaguely aware that I shouldn't be too brutal, that after all she was still new to this, but each ragged breath she drew prompted me to drive in harder, faster, deeper. I wanted her to feel like she had died and gone to Valhalla, and it didn't hurt that I was feeling indescribable pleasure either. Sigyn seemed to have been born for this, created to make all my fantasies come true.

Finally, when the soaked top cover had been removed after my fourth climax of the night and what must have been even more for Sigyn, we collapsed under the sheets. Both of us were covered in a thin film of sweat, but I pulled her close to me despite the heat. Sigyn already had her eyes closed and her head rested on my chest, and I found it difficult to stay awake despite wanting to preserve such a perfect moment forever.

**Epilogue**

Odin

Dawn was painting the sky a bright variety of oranges and pinks when I arose from my bed. Thor was usually awake at this time, the sound of his heavy footfalls echoing in the halls as he headed off to spar with his comrades or eat breakfast, but today all was quiet. _Well, I suppose the lad has good reason to linger in his bedchamber... I certainly would in his place_.

The wedding had certainly been marvelous, despite the slight problems regarding the bride, and even she had done her part successfully.

Loki hadn't attended, eliminating the possibility of disruption. Really, the boy needed to have himself a frivolous caprice with a woman unengaged and get over her instead of shutting himself in his chamber or moping about the palace grounds. People were noticing and he was already unpopular.

I sighed, perhaps the thing to do was set him straight myself.

The marble floors sent a chill through my boots and into my feet as I headed to the heavy wooden door that barred Loki in his miserable solitude from the rest of us. When I arrived, there was no sound from inside, but then again, Loki never was as loud as Thor. Knocking yielded no reply from inside.

"Loki." No answer.

"Loki, pull yourself together lad." I admonished, but decided that it might be more effective in person. "I'm coming in."

The door squealed open, the noise echoing in the corridor, and revealed to me was an impeccably neat room that was devoid of any trace of Loki, save for an envelope on the bed. It was sealed with emerald wax, and was intended for Odin All-father. It read:

Odin,

What you have tried to do is unforgivable, and I take pride now in knowing that I am not your son. I give you advice now, though I know you will not heed it; do not attempt to search for us. You will be unrewarded in your pursuit, try as you may.

This will likely be our last correspondence , so farewell. I would have you tell Frigg that I appreciated how she at least tried to be a mother. To Thor, I would have you ask, how does it feel?

Loki Laufeyson

With the letter in my hands, I tore down the hall to Thor's bedroom. It sharply contrasted Loki's chamber, with a tangled mess of sheets and two emptied wine goblets. I was staring at the open window as I realized there was a letter on the bed, also addressed to me, which read, in more feminine script:

Check the wardrobe... and good luck.


End file.
